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1 Compliment a...
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2 Video
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3 Discussion
We will discuss compliments in this unit, which covers the differences between Chinese and English compliments, compliment responses and the social functions of compliments as well. Before we come to today’s study, let’s think about some questions: How often do you compliment others? How do you feel when you are complimented?s
1. Compliment
Compliment is what a speaker says politely to the hearer about his good qualities or his good possession which make the hearer happy or good. Compliments are positive expressions or evaluation, which are directed either explicitly or implicitly to someone for something valued positively by the speaker and the hearer. It means an expression of admiration, approval, etc. Compliment is an essential part of daily verbal communication. Various expressions of compliment and compliment responses manifest the cultural variations and different cultural roots.
2. Differences between Chinese and English compliments
One of the characteristics of Chinese culture is to emphasize the harmony of interpersonal relationship and collectivism, therefore Chinese people tend to be modest and indirect in response to compliments. On the whole, the Chinese compliment each other much less frequently than the Westerners do. Chinese people are cautious about drawing a line between compliment and flattery — an act which is considered very low and mean among Chinese people. Quite often they do comment on things and people favorably. Under these circumstances they usually quickly make it clear that they do not intend to flatter, or even compliment. Let’s see one example:
A:Your shoes are beautiful. How much did they cost?
B:Only 50 yuan.
A:That’s reasonable. I think I’m going to buy a pair tomorrow.
Positively commenting on something can indicate that the speaker likes to possess it. Therefore, the Chinese will quickly add that he intends to buy it, to negate the possibility of conveying a request.
Now, let’s see the differences from the linguistic aspect. More Chinese compliments begin with “you” or “your”; while English compliments with “I”. e.g. 你很用功，进步也很快。/ I really enjoyed your class. More English compliments contain exaggerated adjectives like great, awesome, terrific, gorgeous, fabulous, smart…
3. Compliment responses
Compliment is a kind of adjacency, with the state of compliment and response co-occurring. If A compliments B, B must give a correspondingly certain language response to A’s compliment. English speakers tend to accept compliments, at least in form (direct culture) while Chinese tend to efface themselves in words although they do feel comfortable about the compliments.
Another example,
A:你乒乓球打得真好。
B:不行，不行。
There are mainly 3 types of Chinese compliment responses:
Reassignment:
The characteristic of this strategy is that the complimented doesn’t make direct or positive response to the compliment, but to something else:
A: You speak English so well.
B: I just get a nerve.
Negation:
Negation is a commonly used strategy in Chinese compliment speech act, which shows negation or objection to the compliment.
A:You are just an angel in the dress.
B: Are you kidding me?
Another example:
A foreign visitor A was looking at the host’s (B) potted flowers with obvious admiration:
A: The plants were blooming profusely.
B: Growing flowers is my hobby, but I’m not much good at it.
In this case, the Chinese would be suspected of “fishing for compliments”, even though the remarks might have been quite sincere. The result is B had to be forced to say something like “But these flowers are beautiful.”
Silence:
Silence is a main response strategy, in which the complimented person keeps silent without verbal response but in smile, silence or nodding.
A: Wow, how beautiful you are today!
B: Smile/Nodding
English compliment responses:
Acceptance& agreement:
Usually say “thanks” or “I like it, too.” for response.
A: Your dress is elegant.
B: Thank you. / Yeah, I think so.
Magnification:
This response is to accept the compliment, but need self-compliment because the compliment receiver thinks it is not enough. This situation always happens between acquittances.
A: That is a nice drawing.
B: Only nice? It is perfect.
Directive rejection:
This response reflects the straightforward character of English people.
A: Your car is smart.
B: Oh, no. I don’t really like it.
4. Social functions of compliments
Compliments have a series of social functions: creating or reinforcing solidarity, greeting people, expressing thanks or congratulations, encouraging people, softening critic, starting a conversation, or even overcoming embarrassment. Some examples to illustrate the functions:
Greeting people:
(A boss meets his young female employee in the morning.)
A: Well, you look good today. You have such nice clothes.
B: Thank you. I have had this for a while.
Expressing thanks:
A: Thanks for the Christmas present you sent me. It’s so nice and just what I needed.
B: I’m glad you like it.
Getting over embarrassment:
(Two friends decide to make up after a quarrel. One comes to the apartment of the other.)
A: Hi, Mary. How are you?
B: OK. How are you?
A: I’m fine. (pause)
B: Oh, this vase is really pretty. When did you get it?
Let’s make a conclusion of compliments and compliment responses. Why do they differ in Chinese and English cultures? The characteristics of Chinese culture are respecting the others, a conservative mind over a long history, inner-land traditional culture, regarding human beings and nature as a whole, applying collectivism and observing hierarchy. While English culture focuses on respecting themselves, longing for freedom, equality and individualism. Language is the carrier of culture, which records its development.We should try to know the cultural differences and social customs. Only in this way, can we communicate with the native English speakers freely.
How often do you compliment others? And what are their responses? Would you like to share your experience with us online?
