1.7.3 Ⅲ.范文赏析
Ⅲ.范文赏析

范文1:

My Best Friend

Upon the words “best friend”, a figure jumps into my mind(jump这个词使一个人物形象活灵活现地展现在读者眼前)—Zhang Ye—my schoolmate in senior high school and also my best friend. During the three years in high school, we shared countless moments of laughter and tears, joy and sorrow.(排比句式能使表达更有力度,而且将与朋友的共同经历描绘得丰富多彩)

She is of medium height and slim figure. Though not strong,she is really a girl with amazing stamina(毅力). Despite the similarities in our outlook on life and living, it is always she, the physically weaker one, who encouraged and urged me to finish some tasks when I attempted to give up. When we were preparing for the National Entrance Exam, she cheered me up emotionally and would give me a hand whenever I was in trouble. But for everything she did for me, I couldn't have had this opportunity to give a decent job with a decent pay. After the exam, she got enrolled by Tsinghua University in Beijing while I went to a college in south China. (对三年中两人共同勉励、共同奋斗经历的叙述为读者展示了一段难忘的人生时光,确实不愧为好朋友)For the past several years, we have been in touch and share everything we are experiencing, sad or happy, dull or exciting.

True friendship lasts life long. Friendship is a magic. It can melt the ice in one's heart and blow away the mist on one's mind.It can inspire others and outdo the self. (再次应用排比句式表达了对友谊真谛的理解,感人至深)I believe the friendship between Zhang Ye and me will be the life-time beacon for both of us.

范文2:

An Eye-Witness Account of a Traffic Accident

My name is Li Ming. I am studying at college. A week ago I saw a traffic accident, which is still vivid in my mind.(介绍自己的基本信息及事情发生的时间)

It was at about 9∶00 on Saturday morning, June 15th, when I went out of the university to visit a friend of mine in another university. I was walking leisurely on the sidewalk when I heard a loud crash and I found that two vehicles just hit head-on at the T-junction about 10 meters away. I went up and found that the two taxis were badly damaged. One door of a car was knocked off,lying on the road. One driver was bleeding and the other was shut in the taxi. Some people were trying to help the driver get out of the damaged car. One man was calling the traffic policeman station. As a result, a lot of cars were jammed on the road.(以事件发生的先后顺序详细介绍车祸的经过)

From the stopping track on the road, it is clear that the two taxis were driving too fast. But it is just one of the reasons. In my opinion, the taxi drivers were eager to take more passengers and make a little more money. On the other hand, both drivers didn't show concern for one another. Both of them wanted to run in front of the other. Therefore, the accident was inevitable. From this matter, we should let the drivers keep it in their mind that speeding does harm not only to themselves but also to others.Taking care of others'lives means taking care of their own life.(分析了事故原因,表达了作者对整个事情的反思)

范文3:

The Day My Classmate Fell Ill

In the summer sports meeting last year, one of my classmates,John/Jane Doe, suddenly fell to the ground and hurt her left foot when he/she was practicing high jump. His/Her face turned pale and showed great pain.(简单描述了我的同学的摔倒的先后情况)

Seeing this, our classmates immediately came to her aid. They struggled to take her to the temporary emergency room. One boy untied his/her shoe and applied ice rocks to his/her wound.Meanwhile, girls comforted her in a soft voice. Soon the P. E.teacher came. He checked his/her wound and took some emergency measures to lessen her pain. Fifteen minutes later, the ambulance arrived and she was sent to hospital. Luckily enough, with our care and concern, John/Jane Doe recovered quickly.(同学、老师和我是如何帮助他/她的)

Such an incident impressed everyone present. I realize that love and care are the best medicine for an injured person.(人与人之间的这种互相关爱给我的感受是……)