Why are Chinese so direct?

Tuesday, December 10, 2013 // Blog

Chinese have a reputation for being direct towards people both in their speech and actions. For Chinese this is common but for foreigners it can be a major challenge while either traveling, studying or working in China.

My best advice is to not think about it too much. Chinese interact with one another in their own way, which is usually more direct, just as Westerners tend to be (not always) less direct in their speech. It’s not that either is more correct, but just the way it is.

One example that always gets brought up is talking about physical appearances. It is very common for Chinese to tell one another “You put on weight recently” or “Wearing those clothes makes you look skinnier.” For a Chinese, neither sentences are really a critique or a compliment on that person’s appearance nor are they meant to carry sentiments of which the listener is expected to react to with some other kind of emotion of their own. Instead, the Chinese feel they are stating the obvious and in fact may even be curious as to why the way someone looks the way they do. Even if there is curiosity, however, it’s not necessarily related to some sort of judgment.

Likewise with foreigners Chinese tend to talk the same way. “You have a really big nose” is a common phrase foreigners hear along with “You are so tall” and “Your hair is blond.”

If you can remember that there aren’t any offensive notions attached to what they are saying and really consider the different ways Chinese speak to you then you can realize they are just direct in nature. Think of it rather as just an observation or a statement based on the obvious from their worldviews. It doesn’t necessarily mean they are right, but it is what it is.

Chinese also talk really fast and to the point. Actually, this is quite common in big cities all over the world but in China where there is a much larger population and Chinese are used to doing things quickly, the need for being direct and fast is a must.

For a Chinese, they really just want to get to the point of a conversation and not spend time chatting on the phone over details that should have been thought up before the conversation. Also, in China phone companies charge by the minute and there are no such things as free calls after 7pm or on the weekends to getting that fast phone call in is a must! Because Chinese usually have a lot going on with work and other things in their lives, they make it a point to keep things short.

If you don’t think this is how it goes try being direct with a Chinese but in a manner, which you have received before. Obviously, like in any language if you walk up to someone and say “I have never seen such a foul-smelled funny looking Wanker in my life” then likely that person is going to get upset. Rather, if you comment on something that they may not consider so personal such as their weight you are likely to see that they will not react with offensive statements.

This is hard to practice but what it comes down to is understanding and knowing that people express themselves and communicate in different ways. I have seen people get into arguments over innocent statements and hopefully you can avoid similar scenarios.

选自：http://chineseconnects.com/why-are-chinese-so-direct/

Chinese and Western Thinking

Even though we all aware that people from different countries have their own way of thinking, sometimes we can barely avoid some culture shock and misunderstanding. What to know about the differences between Chinese and western thinking? We’re going to talk about the major differences from these aspects: perspective, priority, tendency, focus, attitude and means of expression. The following discussion may help you have a better understanding.

Western vs Eastern Way of Thinking

Be aware that the comparison of thinking between China and western countries is only talking in generalities, thinking patterns vary from person to person, we are not saying that each Chinese or western people think the same way as what we’re going to talk about. According to different thinking patterns from one country to another, here we are going to start our discussion from kinds of aspects below.
 

1.Perspective: Holistic vs Analytic

Chinese people usually look at the whole picture, while western people tend to focus on objects and their properties. As a result, in certain circumstance, Chinese way of thinking is holistic with a “broader vision”, and western thinking is analytic with a “narrow vision”.
 

2.Priority: Group vs Individual

Chinese people value more group achievements, while western people think it more important to have self-improvement and achieve success. Due to the cultural difference of individualism and collectivism, western and Chinese people think and act in different ways.

Group is the top priority for Chinese people, and sometimes they will make sacrifice for the good of the whole group, because of the idea of unity and harmony. But for most western people, personal choice and freedom value more, self-promotion and self-worth are encouraged.  

3.Tendency: Paradoxical thinking vs Rule-based thinking

Easterners, including Chinese people, tend to be more open to paradoxical thinking, they believe that it’s normal to meet contradictions, so rules will change accordingly. However, westerners are the opposite, they are strict with logic and rule-based thinking, they will always keep the essential law when it comes to specific problems.

4.Focus: Relationships vs Categories

Chinese people focus more on the relationships and details, while western people emphasis more on categories. What’s more, westerners identify different objects, and try to discover laws and principle by categorizing those objects. The western way of thinking is quite helpful for achieving scientific and technological advancements.

    On the contrary, Chinese people, and also other eastern people, concern more about the relationships between different things, with more flexibility according to the specific context. Based on Chinese way of thinking, there is no strict rule for how the world runs, as paradoxes and contradictions always exist.

5.Attitude: Keep real feelings vs Show real feelings

Chinese people tend to be more subtle than western people. Sometimes, Chinese people will keep the real feelings to themselves and accept opinions from the majorities, in order to not hurt any other person’s feeling. It’s possible that Chinese people feel angry on the inside without reflecting their feelings on the outside. For example, you can’t tell whether some Chinese people get mad, because they may smile politely, but maybe they’ve already got angry internally.  

    Westerners hold the opposite attitude. For most western people, you can easily know they’re angry or happy from their faces, because they show real feeling externally, instead of hiding it. When it comes to conflict, they argue for their own ideas, but they will laugh off afterwards, rather than taking it personally.

6.Means of Expression: Indirect vs Direct

Chinese people prefer an indirect way to express their feelings, while western people love to communicate directly with other people. For westerners, it’s a respectful and honest way to say “No” or “I don’t know”, without misleading other people. 

On the contrary, Chinese people consider an indirect way is more polite, so that they don’t like to say “No” directly. When it comes to negative topics, instead of direct statements, Chinese people would like to hear “between the lines”.

In conclusion, there is no “right” or “wrong” when we talk about the major differences between Chinese and western thinking. Our purpose is to get to know about the differences and try to understand the local people, not to persuade you to change your way of thinking. To tell the truth, the best solution to deal with culture differences is to show respect and learn from each other.

  选自：https://www.topchinatravel.com/china-guide/chinese-and-western-thinking.htm

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