Diary of a fresher

Sunday

1 After a wearisome expedition by car from home, we arrive at my hall of residence, and I check in. The warden gives me a set of keys and a room number. My room is five floors up, and the lift has a sign on it, “Out of order”. Finally, with my mother flushed and gasping for breath, we find Room 8, I unlock the door, and we all walk in.

2 After one minute, my father climbs out. The room is barely big enough for one, and certainly not big enough for the whole family. I can stretch out full-length on the bed and touch three walls without moving a muscle. 

3 Lucky my brother and my dog didn't come too.

4 Later. My parents have just left. I'm here alone, hemmed in by my books and a suitcase. What do I do next?

Monday

5 There's a coffee morning for first-year students. I meet my tutor, a lofty man with sloping shoulders, who looks determined to be affable.

6 “Have you come far?” He peers down at me. As he speaks, his head jerks wildly from side to side, which makes his coffee spill into the saucer.

7 “I live not far from Edinburgh, about six hours away,” I explain.

8 “Splendid!” he says, and moves on to the freshman standing beside me. “Have you come far?” he asks, “splendid,” he barks, without waiting for the answer, and moves on. He takes a sip of coffee, and looks thunderstruck to discover the cup is empty.

9 My mother calls. She enquires if I've met my tutor yet.

Tuesday

10 Am feeling a bit peckish, and it occurs to me that I haven't eaten for two days. I go downstairs and stumble across the dining hall, where I can have three meals a day. I go down and join a lengthy file of people winding its way out into the open.

11 “What's for breakfast?” I ask the guy in front of me.

12 “No idea. I was too late for breakfast. This is for lunch.”

13 It's self-service and today's menu includes chicken, rice, potatoes, salad, vegetables, cheese, yoghurt and fruit. The boy in front piles it all onto his plate, pays for it, and goes to sit down. I seem to have lost my appetite. 

14 My mother calls. She asks if I'm eating proper meals.

Wednesday

15 I have a lecture at 9 am. I wake up at 8.45. No one has woken me. Weird.

16 I pull on some clothes, and dash over to the lecture hall. I sit down beside a girl who looks half asleep. She inspects me. “Just got up?” she asks. How can she tell?

17 The lecture takes an hour, and at the end I look at my notes. I can't read my handwriting.

18 The girl's name is Sophie and she's an English literature major, like me. She looks frighteningly intelligent, and when we chat after the lecture, she tells me she read the whole of this term's reading list during her gap year. She's a bit impressive, and I feel so ignorant … I don't even think I should breathe the same air as her.

19 Mum calls. She asks if I slept OK.

Thursday

20 It's the Freshers' Fair today, and Sophie and I go along to see how many clubs we can join. We concur that we want to make a lot of friends, so I sign up for ballroom dancing, the Artificial Intelligence Society, bell ringing and the Extreme Sports Club. Sophie signs up for Amateur Dramatics and the Mozart choir. I wonder if Sophie and I are going to stay buddies.

21 Mum calls. My brother has tried to rent out my bedroom back home. Mum reassures me that it's mine for as long as I need it, that it's my home and that they miss me very much, especially the dog. I burst into tears.

Friday

22 In the morning, I go to the library. But it seems I need some form of identification. But I don't have an ID card yet. For some reason, I also have to swear that I won't damage the books or break the library rules, and if I do, I'll be sent to prison. (What!? For speaking too loudly?) It seems that it's a very old library, and the university is inordinately proud of it.

23 Tonight is Club Night at the Students' Union, but I've run out of clean clothes. I'm not sure what happens to my dirty clothes after putting them in the clothes basket and before finding them clean, ironed and folded in my wardrobe. Maybe Mum will call soon.

Translation of the text

大一新生日记

星期日

1 从家里驱车经过一段疲惫的旅程才到达我住的宿舍楼。我进去登记。宿舍管理员给了我一串钥匙，并告诉了我房间号。我的房间在6楼，可电梯上写着“电梯已坏”。等我们终于找到8 号房间的时候，妈妈已经涨红了脸，累得上气不接下气。我打开房门，我们都走了进去。

2 但爸爸马上就从里面爬了出来。这个房间刚刚够一个人住，一家人都进去，肯定容不下。我躺在床上，把全身伸直，不动弹就可以碰到三面墙。

3 幸亏我哥哥和我的狗没一起来。

4 后来，爸爸妈妈就走了，只剩下我孤零零一个人，周围只有书和一个箱子。接下来我该做什么呢？

星期一

5   早上，有一个为一年级新生举办的咖啡早茶会。我见到了我的 导师，他个子高高的，斜肩，好像打定了主意要平易近人。

6 “你是从很远的地方来的吗？”他居高临下地看着我问道。他边说话边晃动脑袋，咖啡都洒到杯托里了。

7 “我家离爱丁堡不太远，开车大约6个小时，”我说。

8 “好极了！”他说，接着又转向站在我旁边的那个新生。“你是从很远的地方来的吗？”他问。但不等那人做出任何回答，他就说道，“好极了！”然后就继续询问他人。他啜了一口咖啡，却惊讶地发现杯子是空的。

9 妈妈打来电话，问我是不是见到了导师。

星期二

10 我觉得有点儿饿，这才意识到我已经两天没吃东西了。我下楼去，踉踉跄跄地到了餐厅，得知一日三餐可以在餐厅里吃。我走下去排队，那队伍像一条长龙弯弯曲曲一直排到了门外。

11“早餐吃什么？”我问前面的男生。

12“不知道。我来得太晚，没赶上早饭。这是午饭。” 

13 午饭是自助餐，今天的饭有鸡肉、米饭、土豆、沙拉、蔬菜、奶酪、酸奶和水果。前面的男生每样儿都取了一些放到托盘上，付了钱，坐下来吃。而我好像已经没胃口了。

14   妈妈打来电话，问我有没有好好吃饭。

星期三

15 我早上 9 点钟有个讲座。我醒时已经 8:45 了。竟然没有人叫我起床。奇怪。

16 我穿好衣服，急匆匆地跑到大讲堂。我在一个睡眼惺忪的女生旁边坐下。她打量我一下，问：“刚起床？”她是怎么看出来的？ 

17 讲座持续了1个小时。结束时我看了看笔记，我根本就看不清我写了些什么。

18  那名女生名叫苏菲，和我一样，也是英语文学专业的学生。她看起来惊人地聪明。听完讲座后我们一起闲聊。她告诉我在间隔年里，她已经把这学期书单上的书全都读完了。她令人钦佩，我觉得自己太无知了，我甚至不配跟她呼吸同样的空气。

19   妈妈打来电话，问我睡得好不好。

星期四

20 今天有新生集会。我和苏菲跑去看我们能加入多少个俱乐部。我们俩都认为我们应该多结交朋友，所以我报名参加了交谊舞俱乐部、人工智能协会、手铃俱乐部和极限运动俱乐部。苏菲则报名参加了业余剧社和莫扎特合唱团。我不知道苏菲和我还能不能继续做好朋友。

21 妈妈来电话了。她告诉我哥哥曾试图把家里我的卧室租出去。妈妈向我保证只要我需要，那永远是我的房间。她还说那是我的家，他们都非常想我，尤其是我的狗。我忍不住泪流满面。

星期五

22 早上我去了图书馆。可是好像我需要一个能证明我身份的证件才能进图书馆。可我现在还没有。出于某种原因，我还得发誓不会损坏书籍、不会违反图书馆的规定，否则我就要进监狱。（什么！？ 就因为大声说话吗？）图书馆看上去很古老，学校为此感到特别自豪。

23 今晚学生会举办“社团之夜”晚会，可我已经没有干净衣服穿了。我可不清楚把脏衣服扔进脏衣篮之后到它们干干净净、熨烫笔挺并叠好放进衣柜之前都发生了什么。也许妈妈快来电话了。