In any crowded city in the world, one of the most important concerns in life is space. Space is very valuable. It is, therefore, often one of the most expensive items to buy. The most costly offices in the world can be found in cities such as Beijing, London, Hong Kong, New York, etc. But it isn’t only businesses that are constantly concerned about space. In less heavily populated areas, people will ask you “How many rooms does your home have?” In cities, the first question anyone will ask you about your home is, “How many square metres is it?” So, how does this affect the people who live in an environment where space is so valuable? How do people manage to cope on an individual basis with this shortage of space?

Everybody needs their own personal space — an area they regard as their own and in which they feel safe, relaxed and comfortable. There have been many experiments carried out to try and discover how people create and protect this personal space. An example of this can be seen in any public waiting area. When somebody goes into a waiting room in, for example, a doctor’s or a dentist’s surgery, it is possible to predict quite accurately where the next person to enter is most likely to sit. He/She will try to avoid sitting next to the first person, he/she will also avoid sitting at the opposite end of the room, as far away as possible from the first person. He/She is most likely to sit about halfway between these two points. The next person who comes into the room will take the largest space that remains, and sit approximately in the middle of that. This continues until eventually somebody enters the room and is forced to sit right next to somebody already there — but if possible he/she will place a bag between him/herself and the person nearest to him/her. This pattern can be seen in any similar situation, such as in a bus or train, a lecture theatre or cinema and so on.

The kind of behaviour described above illustrates the idea that we have a kind of personal space that moves with us, wherever we go. If people move inside this space, we feel rather nervous and threatened. If they keep too far away, we feel a little insulted. If our environment becomes too crowded, we are forced to allow our personal space to become smaller and we also change our behaviour slightly to allow for this smaller personal space.

When we are crushed in a crowded lift, a rush-hour compartment of the subway, or a crowd at a sports event, we are forced to give up our personal space completely and accept other people touching us. What we tend to do in these situations is to pretend the other people don’t really exist. We very deliberately ignore them — and, in the same way, they ignore us. Imagine you have entered a packed lift; what do you do? You will probably try not to face anybody else in the lift — everybody faces the door. You will not look at anybody else in the lift — people usually study the panel that indicates the floor number. You may, perhaps, look at the ceiling or down at the floor. You will probably keep your face as expressionless as possible and will try not to move at all. You might even clasp your hands in front of you, or hold your bag in front of you, to “protect” yourself against the people around you.

People who have to spend most of their time in a crowded environment gradually become more used to having a smaller personal space, but no one can ever live without this space at all. Interestingly, different societies have different ideas about exactly how large a personal space is required. You can easily test your own personal space by standing up and talking to someone. Reach out with your arm and see where on your arm the nearest point on his/her body comes. If you are from a country in Western Europe, you will very likely find that your fingertips are touching his/her body. If you come from an Eastern European country, there is a good chance that he/she will be next to your wrist. If you are from the Mediterranean area, it is common for people to stand much closer and so you may find that he/she is next to your elbow. This need for different personal spaces can obviously cause problems when people from different societies are speaking to each other. Without really knowing they are doing it, one person will back away from the other, who will then move forward. Each person is trying to keep the space between them at the distance he or she feels most comfortable with. Each time one person moves forward, the other feels uncomfortable and so backs away; each time the second person backs away, the other feels uncomfortable and so advances. The couple move slowly across the room until one can move no further as their back is against the wall. At this point they will try to break off the conversation and “escape.”

Problems of personal space do not only exist when people are talking to each other. Similar problems exist when people have to share a working environment. When other people are close to us, we find it difficult to concentrate. Students often find this a problem when they have to share a study area. They solve it by using a variety of techniques or strategies to shut themselves off from the people nearby. They build small physical barriers like a pile of books or their bags or a single book stood up on end. Another method is to rest their elbows on the table and sit with their hands screening their eyes from the people on either side. In this way, they can pretend they are alone or at least a comfortable distance from the other people present.

Another method of telling other people that space belongs to you is to use personal markers. Books, papers and other personal belongings are scattered around the site to make it seem more private to others. Students often have small, personal items such as a toy or doll, which they place at the edge of their territory (usually the edge of the desk). You are basically telling other people that the area is yours and that they should stay away. Spreading out your belongings is also a well-known trick on public transport, where a passenger is trying to give the impression that the seats next to him are taken.

In these ways, and many others, we try to indicate to others the personal space we require. We are trying to help other people avoid making us feel threatened or uncomfortable without having to physically push them away. If these signs are ignored, or misunderstood, we sometimes resort to physical methods of protecting our space. Therefore, it is obvious that in any area of dense population and limited space, people must work harder to understand and respect the signals given out by others. Everybody does need his or her personal space, but to gain it at the expense of another’s space is sure to result in conflict.

在世界上任何一个拥挤的城市里生活，人们最关注的问题之一就是生存空间问题。生存空间极为重要。因此，这通常是花钱最多的项目之一。世上最昂贵的写字楼坐落在北京、伦敦、香港、纽约等城市。不过，不只是生意人整日关注空间问题。在人口不太稠密的城市，人们会问：“你家里有几间屋子？”住在城里，人们问到你的住房时，第一句话就是：“住房有多少平方米？”那么，有的人生活在空间非常宝贵的环境里，这个问题对他们会产生什么影响？人们作为个体如何去面对空间缺乏问题？

人人都需要自己的“个人空间”——一块人们视为己有，从中获得安全感、身心放松、舒适愉快的地方。有人做了好些试验去研究人们如何创造并保护自己的空间。人们在公共场合的举止表现就是现成的例子。比如，有人走进大夫或牙医的候诊室，我们可以较准确地预测下一个人最可能坐的位子。他会避免靠近第一个人坐下，也不会坐到第一个人的对面，离他远远的。他多半会取个中间位置。第三个人进来同样会尽量取余下空间的中间位置。如此下去，总有个人被迫挨近某个人坐下——但他还可能用个提包隔在中间。这类情形在公共汽车、火车、影剧院等地方随处可见。

人们的上述行为说明，不管我们走到哪，都会为自己保留个自我空间。如果有人进入我们的空间，我们会感到紧张，觉得受到威胁。如果别人离自己太远，又感到受了污辱。如果我们的生存环境太拥挤，就只能缩小自我空间，同时稍稍调整我们的行为举止以适应这样的空间。

在拥挤的电梯、上下班时的地铁车厢或在运动会上疯狂的观众群里，我们被挤在一起，只得放弃自我空间，让别人挤自己。遇到这类情形我们会假想其他人好像不存在。我们会有意不理会别人——别人也不理会我们。你要是进了拥挤的电梯，怎么办？你或许会尽量避开他人的眼神——大家都向门而立。你也不会去瞧别的人——大家一个劲盯着显示楼层的仪表板。或许，你会望着天花板，或看着地板。你会尽量面无表情，呆着不动。你甚至会两手交叉胸前，或把提包放在面前，“保护”自己。

人们在拥挤的环境里待久了会慢慢地适应更小的私人空间。空间不管多小，得有才行。有趣的是，到底多大的空间才合适，不同的社会有不同的说法。你站起来和他人交谈就能很容易测出自己的空间。伸出手臂，看它能触及对方身体的哪个部位。在西欧，你的手指很有可能触及对方的身体。在东欧，对方在你手腕附近。在地中海地区，人与人的距离通常更近，所以你可能发现与对方仅一肘之隔。不同国度的人们对私人空间的需求不同，互相交谈时，显然会出问题。无意之中，甲方身子朝后退，乙方会随之往前挪。人们尽量把空间维持在各自感到舒适的范围内。甲方往前挪，乙方觉得不舒适，就往后靠；乙方一后退，甲方也觉得不舒适，便将身子前移。谈话双方慢慢地从屋的这边挪到屋的对面，乙方的身子已靠到墙上，再无挪动的空间。话谈到这份上，乙方会就此打住话茬，“逃之夭夭”。

私人空间的问题不只是在人们交谈时会遇到。人们共事时也会碰到同样的问题。别人靠我们近，我们难于集中注意力。学生必须和他人分享学习空间时就会碰到这个距离。他们采用一些办法或策略来给自己营造一个空间。他们有的堆一摞书，或用书包，或把书立着看，这样来形成个小小的屏障。还有个办法是将胳膊肘放在桌上，两只手把左右两边的视线挡住了。这样，他们可以假想自己独处一室，或至少与他人保持令人舒适的距离。

告诉他人某空间属于自己的另一种办法是用私有物来标志私人空间。书籍、报纸和别的私有物品随意散放在某处更能让别人觉得这是私人空间。学生常把玩具、娃娃这类东西放在旁边（往往是课桌边）。你这样做就是在告诉别人这是你的领地，旁人最好走开。把你的私有物摊开也是你乘坐公共交通工具时的高招，别人就以为你旁边的桌位已被人占了。

我们用这些或别的办法来向他人表明我们需要的空间，这样是在帮助他人，免得当他人让我们感到受威胁或不舒服时，我们只好动手把他们推开。如果别人对这些方法置之不理，或产生误解，有时我们只好诉诸强行手段，捍卫我们的空间。显然，在任何人口稠密、空间有限的地方，人们更要理解、尊重他人传出的这些信号。每个人确实需要自己的私人空间，但如以牺牲他人的空间为代价必然要引起矛盾。